Allison Cheney

Last weekend my Mom got a call that my Aunt Allison was not expected to live through the weekend and that we had better get up there to see her. My mom rushed up there on friday, and on saturday my sisters went up to visit and then saturday night they put Allison on life support. Allison is 58 years old and has down syndrome and has lived a very long life considering her condition. My Mom felt like it was her time to go and that she shouldn't be on life support and so before they did the procedure that would have put tubes in her throat indefinately...the decision was made to pull her off the support. On Sunday before they pulled out all the tubes a group of us went up to be with Allison. Allison is my Dad's twin and so it was my Dad's side of the family...my Nana, Aunt Karen, some of the Owen cousins, my Dad, my Sisters and my Mom. That time at the hospital was very special as we all circled around Ali and cried and laughed and just remembered Allison's life. Allison did something amaizing as she was laying there...she brought a family together that has been torn and hurting for the past few years. No words were said about the past, but just being in the same room was healing.

My Mom and Aunt Karen stayed with Allison all night on sunday and just after midnight on July 14th she quietly passed away. Her funeral was yesturday July 18th and there was a service held for her at the O'Donnel morturary in the avenues. My sister Emily and I sang "The Test" and then people got up and shared memories of Allison. I loved hearing from the workers and other girls in her group home. My favorite thing that I heard was that as of late she loved cheese, and every night she would ask for a slice of cheese. The worker said many times they would come to wake Allison the cheese would be glued to the side of her cheek:) I was able to do all the flowers for the funeral and I loved being able to do this for Allison. She wanted red and pink roses...and they turned out very pretty! After the service our family drove up to the cemetery by the U of U where my Grandpa Cheney and his parents are all buried and there is a big Cheney monument...all of which I have never known about. Allison is now resting in a beautiful spot and I look forward to visiting there again soon. To view her obituary go to http://www.legacy.com/SaltLakeTribune/Obituaries.asp?Page=LifeStory&PersonID=113468284.

Allison came to stay with my family on holidays and other special occasions for most of my life and she always brought a special spirit into the home. She always sat in the same chair against the wall by our phone, she collected purses, pens and notepads and if you gave her a $1 bill (we quickly learned that the amount of the bill didn't matter it was the quantity...singles were better than a $20) her eyes would light up and she would rub her hands together and give you that silly little grin giggle. She also loved Diet Coke and she'd say "more diet." If you were being silly or acting crazy she would say..."you dyin'?"...and her pet name for my Mom was "you Rabbit!" She loved to sing primary songs and Christmas songs and she loved to dance.

I learned a few things this past week...Allison was happy with simple things and she wasn't bogged down with expectations or "things" and sometimes I make things too complex and busy...my Mom is a wonderful example of forgiveness and love...we often hurt the ones we love but we need to forgive and mend relationships and move forward and have happy good moments together...we need to ask our parents about their lives and their stories...and cheese in bed sounds like a great snack before bed!

Allison had tons of purses, stacks of notepads, and hundreds of pens and they let us take some things if we wanted to. My girls love their new purses...and the heart purse that Elsie has is the last purse Ali was using, and that she had by her side at the hospital. It was neatly filled with pens notepads and a hello kitty wallet:)

Love you Allison!